My Blind Corona Shop

No one’s going to be leaning over the pub bar any time soon and ordering a pint of Corona. Time, it seems, has been called on all our social lives for the foreseeable future. The help lines have stopped answering. Even Wayne in Mumbai, who regularly calls, offering to fix …

The Hairy Eared Hound

Children’s literature is the best. When The Son was growing up, I loved reading to him. I do a pretty passable #Eeyore. Some have even commended me on my #Piglet. That’s another story involving prunes and Bombay mix, the ultimate delicacy. One of the joys of reading to very small …

Joy To The World

Forget the heralding of Christmas with the purchase of industrial quantities of Brussel Sprouts. Better to trumpet the festivities with the Jerusalem artichoke. It achieves the same result but for less. Fighting my way through Christmas madness, I find myself shuffling against the tide of shoppers who are straining under …

Spanx Pants

I love a party. I love an elegant pair of shoes, but not enough to wear them for longer than I have to. Having a back up pair of trainers under a table is a good idea. It’s not the end of the world if it’s a good party and …

Laundry Bags and Prophylactics

The mesh laundry bag is making a come back. It’s a much under valued item that will preserve my clothes from the ferocity of the spin cycle on my elderly washing machine. I hope never to hear again, ” Did you know there’s a hole in that?” I will never …

The Side Hussle

Nowadays it’s not uncommon to have a job that is part of the grand scheme of your career as well as a job on the side, that might be a way to make money or it’s just about something you like doing. I met a man whose main business was …

What Not To Buy For Christmas

Everyone has a drawer of dud gifts for recycling. Don’t they? In my drawer are quite a few crystal angels with the power to heal – allegedly.  These were given by people who like to knit their own mung beans.  There is a selection of magnifying glasses I don’t know …

Caution: Zebra Crossing

There is something cringingly uncomfortable about making your mistakes in public: I have a long and distinguished experience of being the subject of public amusement. It’s not a comfortable place to be. Not looking or behaving like

The Bagging Area

A long long time ago when God was a boy and before I had teeth, I can remember sitting on the counter in the green grocers while he weighed out sugar to be bagged up in a heavy duty blue bag sealed shut with tape. Now that I have teeth …

Robbed Blind

Last Saturday I got home to find the milk was off and the cheese I thought might last the course of my absence, was now cultivating penicillin. There was nothing for it but to head to the market on a dreary afternoon when I’d much prefer to have been listening …