What Not To Buy For Christmas

Everyone has a drawer of dud gifts for recycling. Don’t they? In my drawer are quite a few crystal angels with the power to heal – allegedly.  These were given by people who like to knit their own mung beans.  There is a selection of magnifying glasses I don’t know …

It’s Behind You

I have an inherent fear of snakes. Even the most innocuous of grass snakes assumes the status of an anaconda in my imagination. As a child, I sought out the privacy of a large bush, only to discover that I had picked the very spot favoured by adders. I don’t …

Spontaneous Combustion

A conversation about unemployment rates amongst disabled people of working age reminded me, not only how lucky I have been, but of the sheer lunacy of prejudice. If it weren't quite so serious it would be funny. My teenage ambition was to be a criminal defence barrister. I was not …

Cinque Terra

Weirdly, I quite like walking uphill. There is no denying that age, expanding girth and lack of fitness make this more of a challenge than for the younger, thinner and fitter, but as my friend, The Big Cheese, would say, "none of us are getting any younger or any thinner". …

Out To Dinner

My hosts were in their usual good form. The food was excellent. The wine was flowing and the slow gin homemade. The conversation was about the local fishmonger and the aspirations of young adult children, holidays taken and the long

Whats That App?

I like to think I am a woman in my prime. The evidence does not necessarily support this position. There are those that think I have the technology skills of an Edwardian, retaining something of a fondness for pen and paper. I hanker

What’s Up with You?

I was in a pizza restaurant dithering over what to chose. “My God,” said my newest colleague. “Your eye sight is terrible. You should go to Pakistan and get that fixed. My wife had terrible sight. Not that bad, but she really did have trouble.

Locked Out

There are lots of apples falling off the tree in next doors garden. There is an abundance of windfalls, in my garden, that the local wildlife like to avail themselves of. In my efforts to deter the marauding intruders with fur, tails and long yellow teeth, I have just been …

A Fugitive From Justice

Being a fugitive from justice is a stressful experience. I know, because I experienced this. I experienced it briefly, just for a nano-second, in the REM dream state that most of us experience just before we wake up. My crime? I was caught on camera driving

All Teched Up

I love technology: I love the oven, the kettle, the toaster. I loved the TV I grew up with. That's the one that had an enormous "V" shaped areal that extended out of the top and sat on four screw in legs. It had a button for turning it on …